Something that annoys me year after year after year after year is the increasing early preparations this country makes for its holidays. When I was growing up, people did their Christmas shopping and put up Christmas decorations in December—you know, that month with Christmas in it. Likewise, Thanksgiving was celebrated on the fourth Thursday of November, which happens to be, strangely enough, Thanksgiving, and Halloween was celebrated on Halloween, as opposed to not-Halloween.

These days, things are vomit-inducingly different. The Christmas season, for all intents and purposes, is in full swing, fully two months early. (Don’t get me wrong: Christmas is my third favorite day of the year behind the day daylight saving ends and St. Patrick’s Day.) Stores have had Halloween decorations up for a month, and I’ve seen carved pumpkins on front stoops for at least a few weeks. People, pumpkins don’t last that long. They get moldy and gross within a few days, if not smashed by the teenage locals. Thanksgiving talk has already started, too. Lest we forget, none of the three holidays have even so much as approached yet.

So, for those of you who on December 26 will promptly begin preparations for Christmas ’08, this website may be of some guidance. Please, do visit and learn from its infinite wisdom.

(via Majorly English)