Kevin, M.D. linked to a video today that satirizes the recently-vetoed S-CHIP bill designed to simultaneously insure more children and reduce smoking. You know, in America, where we live and we have actual citizens and issues and stuff to take care of. As opposed to the Middle East, which we occupy.

Also,

Ridiculous. They’re completely missing the point. How could someone possibly interpret this bill as pro-smoking? What smokers do you know who will gladly pay for cigarettes that come with a hefty tax? It’s not as though they’re cheap in the first place. I happen to think the design of the bill—promoting something good while canceling something bad—is brilliant, and I’ve said as much in the past (however indirectly). It will inevitably reduce some smoking to some extent.

I equate it with recent taxes on SUVs in London, which are quite severe. Same principle: The government needs more money, so tax something deleterious and kill two birds with one stone. If you drive an SUV in London, you’re going to pay dearly for it. Who in their right mind would then go out and happily buy an SUV??

Oh yes, let’s also not forget that the “billions” these people are purporting this bill to cost in order to fund the program—the whole program, all several years’ worth of it—is what the US is currently spending in Iraq every single week. This “no smokers, no health care” BS is completely baseless. Perhaps if we weren’t throwing the country’s money away like it’s our job (which, it seems, it is), we’d not have to rely on taxing cigarettes.

Okay, not really. The most famous person I’ve ever met was Paul Simon, the former US Senator from Illinois, when I was about 10, and at that age, shaking hands with a US Senator who wore a bow tie really wasn’t all that cool. It was pretty uncool, actually. Not to mention the fact that, when you’re 10, you don’t really get the point of the hand-to-hand embrace that one must perform when greeting another. Suffice it to say that I was a little weirded out.

Anyway, back to the topic of knowing someone (not really) famous. One of my former fellow students and a former TA of mine, now an intern, was quoted in today’s RedEye, a child publication of the Chicago Tribune, regarding the similarities between the show Nip/Tuck and the lives of actual plastic surgeons:

‘Are there doctors that exist like that? I’m sure it’s based on a kernel of truth,’ said Trang Nguyen, 28, a first year resident in plastic surgery at the University of Chicago Medical Center. ‘All the plastic surgeons I’ve had the opportunity to work with are anything but what you see on TV. They are not the money-hungry womanizers you see on ‘Nip/Tuck,” she said.”

The rest of the article itself is pretty good. Sounds like plastic surgeons have surprisingly normal lives—except for that whole “I make 80x more money than you, and I aced my boards to boot” thing. Screw you, USMLE, screw you.

This is a fantastic idea. I’m surprised no one’s thought of it before now. Forcing students to take pride in what they write while at the same time preventing plagiarism is something I’m sure every professor who gives writing assignments would love. Wikipedia seems a match made in heaven. Now, if they would only stop being so pesky about what they allow and disallow…

Some people—not many, but some—think me a smart man. Medical school, graduate school, whatever—must be smart. I have a secret for you: not so, my friends. (If anything, I should probably be considered dumb simply on account of having spent so much time in school. Who does that?)

And so now that we have established my inferior being, it is with great pride that I hereby announce my first-ever of an entire crossword puzzle, sans assistance, just a few moments ago. I held a little ceremony in my head, followed by the ridiculous feeling that comes after holding a ceremony in one’s head for a completely insignificant event. But, I do feel a little smarter.

I’m coming for you, Shortz.

Or visit, or inhale, or even live there.

Steve Mirsky, of the Scientific American podcast Science Talk, on James Watson’s recent comments regarding race and intelligence:

Watson, in fact, made some pretty stupid comments about Africans having lower intelligence than Europeans. He later said, ‘I cannot understand how I could have said what I am quoted as having said.’ Watson knows a lot about some things; he also knows very little about other things that he nevertheless expounds upon. For example, in 1998, Watson said that cancer would be cured in two years. According to thousands of reports just issued in hundreds of journals, there’s still cancer.”

Snap.

Time for another edition of the Cancer Research Blog Carnival. Check out the Bayblab blog for more details or to submit your entry.

My brother’s birthday was September 6, and he happens to be a fan of the movie Talladega Nights. What did I do? I ordered license plates for his car that say “SHK N BK”, which, if you’ve seen the movie, you’ll realize is a cool thing to have—provided you’re a teenaged dude who’s into going fast, possibly breaking the law from time to time, and watching mindlessly hilarious movies. Perfect present, in my opinion, and he’s been excited for them ever since he got the word that they’re on their way.

Trouble is, I ordered the damn things on August 16. Sure, I thought, they might be a few days—weeks, even—late given that we’re dealing with a governmental body here, and a rather crappy one to boot if I may so opine. No biggie. It’s the thought that counts anyway. I eventually got word that they shipped out of Springfield—the one in Illinois that’s a 3-hour drive from Chicago—on September 12. No biggie. Two weeks late max. I’m golden.

Trouble is, I found out this morning that it sometimes takes up to 30 days for them to arrive. From Springfield. Illinois. I received antibodies this morning that were shipped from California on Monday night. 36 hours. Okay, whatever. No biggie. 30 days isn’t so big a deal as long as I get them.

Trouble is, according to my calculations, it’s been well over 30 days. Of course, I bring this up to the woman on the other end of the line as well, who is merely a string of completely unpleasant and overtly rude employees working for the Secretary of State here in the great broke state of Illinois with whom I’ve dealt during this debacle. After she performs some calculations of her own, she informs me that, “Yes, 30 days is a long time, sir, but we cannot be sure that they have been lost in the mail until we have waited 50 days after shipment for them to be returned to us, at which point we will re-press and re-ship them.”

Trouble is, 50 days is like 10 more days from now, according to my calculations, at which point I will inevitably have to deal with these mean people again, re-order the plates, and wait another 14 years to get the new ones. And no, I can’t cancel the order and have my $126.25 for two pieces of painted metal refunded to me. Ever. Even if they haven’t arrived 14 years and one week from now.

In the meantime, my brother is neither shaking nor baking, and it saddens him. If he ain’t first, he’s last, after all. What saddens him more is that he doesn’t have a front plate at the moment, and he’ll probably be getting more than a few tickets for it over the next decade and a half.

Some of my photography of stuff in Chicago is being featured on the front page of Chi-Town Daily News, a local site for news and events. Check it out. Not bad for a tiny point and shoot…

My third post is up on Medscape’s group medical student blog, The Differential. Check it out. The first and second can be found here and here, respectively.